Taking a Step Back

I am a big believer in preaching to myself. Anyone who has had a couple of conversations with me will know that. I, like most of you, have found the year 2020 to hold more than its fair share of challenges. A lot of us are facing financial, health, social, and political struggles unlike anything we have faced before. Personally, our business is in danger (you really don’t want to be in the events business right now) and we are faced with daunting decisions about how to provide for our family. Riots are happening all over the United States and Christians across the country are split between obeying our government, and limiting Corporate Worship, or taking a stand and meeting together in the name of Jesus anyway.

Truth be told, it is just getting to be too much for me to handle. The last couple of days I have found myself withdrawing from the things around me. I am still functioning and dealing with the daily responsibilities, but I find my mind is trying to escape to the pleasant things of the past. The times when things were more peaceful or times when I was happy. The ocean is my happy place. In my mind I am at my favorite lighthouse gazing over the ocean and I breathe deeply as the wind blows in my face. As pleasant as those memories are; I can see myself going down a dangerous path. Living all up in my head is not where I need to be. Those memories are good and I delight in them, but I can’t live there. God wants us to live out our days clinging to Him and walking out our lives in His strength. Sometimes I cling to the wrong things.

Ps. 88:1-3 O LORD, God of my Salvation, I cry out day and night before you. Let my prayer come before you;incline your ear to my cry! For my soul is full of troubles…

It is time to take back control. My house is still undergoing construction projects, our source of income in the future is still up in the air, health trials abound, and I am truly grieving over how life has changed in the last 5 months, but I have come to the conclusion that it is time to take a step back. I feel the need to hide myself in the cleft of the rock, so to speak. My whole family is feeling the strain of life circumstances right now and it has resulted in fighting and unrest. When you multiply that x12 (people) it is very overwhelming.

Now comes the time when preaching to myself becomes so important. When I survey the situation, it is easy to want to hide and just ignore how the strain is affecting us all, but that isn’t the solution and I know that. Today I take an honest look and make a plan. When I feel myself mentally pulling away from “life” I know I need to take action.

I know that I cannot rely on my own strength. I simply don’t have it. I am so thankful that I can rest in Jesus.

Matt. 11:28 Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

I need His rest so desperately.

Ps. 27:7 The LORD is my strength and my shield; in Him my heart trusts, and I am helped; my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks.

In Him my heart trusts, and I am helped…sigh…I just want to breathe that in.

Isa. 12:2 Behold, God is my salvation; I will trust and will not be afraid; for the LORD GOD is my strength and my song, and he has become my salvation.

God is my strength, my song, and my Salvation – I am holding onto that!

Getting deeply into the Word of God is something that I need to do consistently. Not just a quick scripture, but actually studying and soaking in the Word.

Now for the practical part. Anyone who has children knows a consistent flow to the day makes for more peaceful children. Unfortunately, the last 5 months have been filled with late nights, too much tv, crazy days, and sleeping in. It’s time to get this train back on the tracks and headed in the right direction. Part of taking a step back is not letting the chaos of life disrupt every part of life. In the next week we are moving back to consistent bed/wake-up times, more family reading and less tv. Life is too beautiful to live in an overwhelmed state. We don’t need more socialization, or parks, or summer activities. We need down time, time away from the negativity that abounds, time where we can be together as a family without worrying, planning for the future, or assessing all of the work that still needs to be done. We need to take a step back from the world and make a point of cultivating a peaceful house in the midst of the chaos.

Throughout history trials have been in abundance. Sin abounds in the world and there will never be true peace until we are with Jesus. This house, this family should be a place of peace and rest…a respite from the world. I have let worldly troubles take away my peace. Today, I stop living in my head. Today, I strive to cultivate that peaceful environment that we so desperately need (this will take a lot of work and consistency). The noise will still be here, the mess will always have to be cleaned, but a peaceful atmosphere is to be treasured. An atmosphere where Jesus abounds and we cheer each other on instead of tear each other down.

“There is a peace in rhythm. There is a security and predictability…Just enough to make us feel like everything is going to be okay.” – Unknown